Hello! Just a quick note to say that Night Owls, the company that prints and ships my merch, has recommended that if you’re looking to get items from my merch store in time for Christmas, you should probably place those orders by THIS SATURDAY, DECEMBER 10. The USPS is backed up as it is, plus the holiday chaos. So, if you want your dear Gam-Gam and Mee-Maw to unwrap those sweet SELLOUT shirts with the skulls and nooses all over them this December 25, I’d suggest you get those orders in THIS WEEK.
In fact, this week, all orders over $50 get 15% off. That way, you can get a shirt for yourself and one for your sweetheart. Maybe you can get two of the same design if you’re one of those couples that dresses alike. Or maybe you can get two different designs and swap shirts if you’re one of those couples who are similar in size. No sartorial judgment from me!
Just use the discount code LASTCHANCE at checkout.
Also, it goes without saying, but SELLOUT makes a great holiday gift book! At under 25 bucks, it’s the perfect gift for someone you like but not too much. An ideal white elephant gift. Every publication has recommended it in their gift guides or books-of-the-year roundups: NPR, The New York Times, Vanity Fair, Pitchfork. Oh wait. Actually, not Pitchfork. SELLOUT didn’t meet their impeachable editorial standards and was snubbed. SNUBBED! Ah well, can’t say I blame them. If someone had written a book that points out that I’ve been dead wrong for the last 25 fucking years, I wouldn’t cover it either.
I’ve actually been working out some Mad Men-style marketing slogans for SELLOUT. Here’s what I got so far…
Looking for a gift for that weird goth cousin whose whole "thing" no one in the family really "gets"? ...SELLOUT by Dan Ozzi.
Need a gift for that 30-something in your family who doesn't have kids but has a ton of enamel pins on their jean jacket? .....SELLOUT by Dan Ozzi.
Looking for the perfect gift for that person in your family who couldn't make it to Thanksgiving dinner because they used all their vacation time on something called "fest"? .....SELLOUT by Dan Ozzi.
Need a gift for that person in your family who complains the whole drive to church on Christmas while wearing a Propagandhi shirt? .....SELLOUT by Dan Ozzi.
You know that couple whose wedding you went to where their first dance was to "Swing Life Away"? .....two copies of SELLOUT by Dan Ozzi.
Need a gift for that guy in your life who posts photos on Instagram from so far back in the venue that you have no idea who's on stage, with the caption "best band"? ....SELLOUT by Dan Ozzi.
Looking for something for your friend who insists on dressing his infant in a Descendents onesie? .....SELLOUT by Dan Ozzi.
Ever been looking through a friend's record collection and asked "hey how come you have four different copies of some of these?" .........SELLOUT by Dan Ozzi.
Anyway, I’ve been digging this American Football cover of “Fade into You” today. How bout you?
Order my book, SELLOUT, here:
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